At a crossroads - how I see myself

Not sure how many people saw the Dove advert but I thought about it a lot today. I had tears in my eyes the first time I watched it and again today. Why? Because I am so harsh about myself.

If you haven't seen it. Do watch it. Its quite an eye opener. I think this is the full ad

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpaOjMXyJGk

So first off. I need to do this exercise.  I am going to show a photo and describe myself to you. How I honestly see me.

Look in the mirror, What do I see?
This fat frumpy person looking back at me...

She's got a big nose and chunky thighs
Each time she looks she feels sad and she sighs.

She's got a fat belly, and a couple of chins
years of bad eating and counting those syns!

What bought all this on? Why feeling so down?
She got out those scales, got on, then off with a frown ...

Why did she do it? why step on them to see?
She wanted that number to be kinder you see.

A week of feeling fab, clean eating, and more
yet step on the scales and her heart hit the floor.

Why did it matter? her diet head kicked in
and made her feel a failure and fatter not thin!

Yet old Jackie's gone, and new Jackie's here
pass her a tissue to wipe off that tear

She's got confidence, stands tall, is healthier too
Who cares about a number that's staring at you!

Hold that head high, be proud of how far you have come
That number means nothing, scales are just dumb

They don't show the changes, the habits that are gone
the hurdles jumped over, the feeling she's won!

The binges are over, she knows when to stop
the number eventually just has to drop

So why let a number ruin your day
Pop those bleddy scales away!


I see chins, bulges, fat thighs.  I see crows feet. I see a belly that always make me look pregnant.
I feel conscious of what I see.  I want to hide the rolls of fat from others. I want to pretend its not there. Yet I was far far far bigger.

I realised on watching the Dove advert again I don't see what others see.   Its my perception of me. I need to remember how far I have come. The fact I am happier, healthier, fitter, and have that real smile :) What matters more? A number? What others think?  or how I feel?  How I feel wins :) I've never felt better if I'm honest. I exercise regularly. Never over eat. Eat when hungry and stop when I'm full. My body just needs to catch up abit!  I guess at the end of the day I've spent years abusing my body. Feeding it crap. Not moving it. Not doing anything about it other than dieting, dieting and more dieting.  I need to have that word Darin talks of all the time PATIENCE!!!!!






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