I cannot believe how long its been since I last blogged I really must start doing this regularly as this journey is amazing.
I've been so so busy with LilyRose and my copyright work I've not had much if any spare time lately. LilyRose took off so quickly and I am so so happy about this as I love making the jewellery and medical bracelets and so many lovely mementos and gifts for people.
Anyway, slimpods,. I have stuck around size 18 for a year. If I was dieting I'd be gutted. I'd be a failure. But I have learnt so much in this past year and changed so much. My confidence is returning and without Slimpods I'd never have had the confidence to even consider starting up LilyRose.
Its like chibbling away at layers of an onion. I think I hit the thickest layer but I really do feel I'm nearly through it now. Time to let go of what's left of the weight. I've gone from a size 28 (I believed I was a size 20 at the beginning as I could squeeze into some 20's lol. It was only on measuring and trying on more fitted clothes I realised just how big I had got) I lived in cuckoo land!!
So time to start exercising again and stop making excuses. I've been walking Carla more again and now I feel its time to get Lesley Sansome out or my ttapp walking DVD as they work very well for me and both make me feel better in myself so will probably mix and match and use both. Lesley has that infectious smile. within a couple of minutes of her DVD I'm smiling and determined so that can't be bad can it ? TTapp I love as its helped me to stop slouching, no duck feet hehehehe that phrase makes me laugh but so true walking with feet out etc and its helped my neck and back ache so much, Why did I stop? summer holidays really got out of the routine and simply got lazy.
Done some work recently and feel we've reached the core of my issues around food now, so I just now need to learn to move on without the issues :) I've noticed I no longer go for the crisps. This is huge for me as every issue seemed to = grab and eat two or three packets of crisps, not tasting them just eating them fast as if no control. Not a binge by any means as I've been binge free for two years in December, just like I subconsciously go to them and no stopping me. It has stopped. I am snacking abit on the odd biscuit etc but I'm back to listening to my chocolate pod and its helping alot and going away again. I am feeling so much more in control again too,.
One of the issues it all went back to was big and I've spent 33 years with my mind protecting me, now I know what was causing it the jigsaw is complete. Each piece now in place. Its taken me a couple of weeks to piece together and see all the things it affected. It all makes sense now. Changes are happening.
I always had this thing about approval,. Starting up LilyRose seemed to set this off big time and make it more noticeable. I'd be making a bespoke piece, send photos, await approval, It was fine if that person replied immediately but if they were busy and didn't reply for 24hours my world fell apart each time, my hand went for the crisps as that 'feeling' I got while awaiting approval, not feeling in control, triggered off a reaction. Quite amazing really. As I say so many things in my life make sense now that I know the root cause. The mind is just so powerful its unbelievable.
What has this journey given me? I've said it before and I'll say it again, My life back. I'd been slowly becoming almost hermit like. Not wanting to go out much, not wanting to interact with people, but alot of that goes back to approval too, not being good enough, not feeling good enough, the whole thing was a vicious cycle that seemed to just go round and round. Its gone :) so now I just need to build new ways of doing things. Start enjoying life., As my confidence grows the more it grows in life.
Sometimes I look back and cannot believe the changes in me :) Little mouse Jackie is going bit by bit. New Jackie is emerging day by day. I really can do this. We really really can achieve anything we put our minds to. Its just being determined and never giving up. I've never ever given up on the Slimpods because I know they work I just began to realise at times I overrid them and it was working out why :)
So now its time to reset some smart goals and get on with life. Its almost a weird feeling no longer 'needing food'. Its quite obviously controlled me for such a long time and now I've taken back control. I think thats what made me go for the biscuits and chocolate a little bit later,. Because I could. But it wasn't a binge it was like mmmm really fancy that I'll have it. There are no banned foods. I can have them. Its like a little phase I went through at the beginning of the Slimpods. Enjoying having what I wanted because I was in control and no food was off limits. Then as time goes on you begin to make healthier choices because you want to and thats where my mind is more this week :) woohoo!
Anyone thinking of buying a Slimpod, buy it! Anyone thinking of giving up my question to you is why?? Do you want to go back to dieting? starving yourself? Making food forefront in your mind and start the vicious circle up again?? I certainly don't! You cannot expect the pods to change your life overnight. Yes they will for some, and for others it will take longer, but thats just it many give up before they've really had time to work their magic, assuming they don't work and one of things I've noticed over the years is people miss little changes because they are not writing down their positives. Things like leaving food on their plate. Not feeling hungry until lunch. Eating smaller portions etc etc. Always check you are following those 3 golden rules,. They are such simple easy rules that many drop one or two and just listen. The golden rules are there to help you to succeed so use them! and yes I'll practise what I preach and reset my goals!
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